Communities #201
Winter 2023
Note: You can order a copy of this issue here.
Communities #201, Privacy and Transparency, explores the interplay between guardedness and openness in sharing ourselves and our lives, both within community and in relation to the wider world. Articles delve into the drawbacks and benefits of embracing vulnerability and radical honesty, exposing our own “secrets,” and challenging cultural conventions of self-protection. Authors also look at how to better deal with conflict and “bad behavior,” and describe how innovative communities are welcoming neurological diversity, reviving the kibbutz movement, and populating a new novel. It’s another rich, unique collection of stories related to our themes.
PRIVACY AND TRANSPARENCY
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Letters: Date Rape, Apologies, and the Evolution of Consent by Sharon Blick, Martin Holsinger
In the ’60s, “consent” meant “not saying no.” The results were insidious.
Privacy and Transparency at Pleasant River Community by Dianne Brause
With some of our new neighbors conjecturing that our planned activities might include “biting the heads off of chickens during wild initiation rites,” we decided to be quite overt in our actions. Our ethic of transparency then permeated into other areas of our life as a community.
A Monkeywrencher in Our Midst by David James Duncan
Imagine Lou Roy finding, on the table under the willow outside Rosalia and Eddie’s Airstream, a weather-beaten paperback. Imagine Lou taking the book home to find Edward Abbey advising readers that Karo corn syrup dumped in the gas tanks of developers will slow them down considerably.
Memories of a Mental Nudist Colony by Martin Holsinger
If you thought you were always right, the hottest, coolest person ever, your naked friends’ sometimes fierce but always loving laughter could help show you the way to free yourself from the bad habits you were so proud of.
Preserving Privacy in Community by Gabrielle Anctil
We think twice before knocking on a closed door. That caution is essential, because the majority of my roommates describe themselves as introverts.
Navigating the Boundary Between Transparency and Discretion: Ways in Which Silence Is Less than Golden by Laird Schaub
Burying dirt under the carpet will not create or maintain healthy relationships. It only leads to lumpy floors, and poor footing going forward.
All Eyes on Us? Pondering How to Balance Privacy and Transparency while Dating in Community by Emily Grubman
To be open and transparent with a romantic partner is one thing—and something I’ve been working on for the last few years—but to do that in front of an entire community feels like a challenge all its own.
Surveillance and Fences: Safety and Separation by Riana Good
I hadn’t crossed a stated boundary or broken a law or guideline, yet I felt vulnerable after finding out that I was being monitored. I became curious about others’ feelings of security and insecurity.
The Third Rail of Emotional Abuse by Laird Schaub
It does no good to have a general agreement to work with conflict if there is no agreement about how to go about it, or no confidence in the group’s ability to navigate it successfully.
Working Effectively with Exceptionally Challenging Behaviors, Part Seven by Diana Leafe Christian
The knowledge that we now have a method of ever-increasing community visibility and peer pressure serves as an effective deterrent to bad behavior.
Sólheimar Ecovillage: A Case Study for Neurological Diversity in Cohousing by Charles Durrett
Sólheimar is evidence that we can create spaces that allow for the individuals with disabilities to live full, happy lives, and we have an obligation to give the population the community they deserve.
Rebirth of the Kibbutz? Field Notes of a Journey through Israel’s Urban Communes by Jonathan Dawson
The communal scene that I experienced in the peripheral corners of Israel’s urban landscape is vibrant, dynamic, and fired with a visionary zeal that carries strong echoes of the initial flowering of the kibbutz movement.
The Ecstatic Communion and Revelatory Foibles of Sun House by Chris Roth
The world of Sun House, full of connection, spirit, and community, is a fantasy only if we don’t give it credence. Seen in a clearer light, it’s an analog to the reality depicted in wisdom traditions since time immemorial.
Designing Communities, Not Just Buildings by Kate Nichols
Cohousing Communities—Designing for High-Functioning Neighborhoods offers invaluable step-by-step guidance for future residents.
REACH
How to Build Community: The Book by Raven Moonraven
If you’re interested in starting a community of any type, Yana Ludwig’s Building Belonging is for you. That’s even more true if you want it to be income-sharing.
ON THE COVER: One can “hold it all in” for only so long. Approximately 7,700 years ago, the volcanic Mount Mazama in south-central Oregon let it all out, forming a caldera which now holds Crater Lake (Giiwas in Klamath), the deepest freshwater body in the United States. Photo (from five miles above) by Chris Roth.