Communities #194

Spring 2022

Note: You can order a copy of this issue here.

Issue #194, “Looking Back, Looking Forward,” encompasses stories and lessons from the past 50 years of communal living, reflections on the present, and strategies for adapting to and helping shape the next 50 years. It examines what has worked for intentional community groups from the late 1960s to the present day, and what hasn’t; how past solutions may apply to new challenges; how to enhance diversity in communities; how to deal with especially challenging behaviors (the second installment in a continuing series); and more.

LOOKING BACK, LOOKING FORWARD

Letter: Narcissistic Parents By Sharon Blick, Diana Leafe Christian

We need to think about those most harmed by adults’ narcissistic attitudes and behaviors: their children.

Leaving Childhood Behind By Stephen Wing

It’s time to say goodbye / to what you know, and step naked out on the air.

Notes from the Editor: Questions in Middle Age (or: Communities Turns 50) By Chris Roth

The past offers innumerable lessons for us. The future holds just as many possibilities.

Water: Life in the Wilderness By Carol Ladas Gaskin

Dragging the long, black, one-inch-diameter pipe through the snow, we snaked it up the driveway and into the A-frame, then looped it over the rafters in big soft coils. Buckets stood at both ends. The ice wouldn’t melt.

Stories from a Country Commune By Elaine Sundancer

You say, “Oh yes, I’ll just wash the potatoes,” and then you stand at the sink for half an hour or more, and you realize that when you wash potatoes for 20 people there’s nothing “just” about it.

Celery Wine: Moving Forward By Elaine Sundancer

Take a moment to think about the things you enjoy and use today. Will your grandchildren still be able to enjoy those things? What can we do now so that knowledge and tools and skills survive into the future?

Remembering Tree Frog Farm By Catherine Blinder

It felt powerful. There were communal farms and urban collective households all over the country. We had our own newspapers, rules, rituals, and a version of the underground railroad. We were creating an alternative life.

Nourishing One Another, 50 Years Later By Catherine Blinder

The cooking joy I learned in my early 20s at the farm—finding it there with other women—changed my life inexorably and sweetly.

The Many Failed Theories of Twin Oaks Community By Keenan Dakota

Behaviorism was the first failed theory of Twin Oaks. Instead, we’ve discovered that behavior is changed by policy—especially policy that members have a hand in crafting.

Getting to Know Beans about Community By Chris Roth

Since the fateful day when I realized I didn’t know beans, I’ve learned more than I ever could have conceived of from within my limited worldview at the time, and made choices I’d only vaguely dreamed about before.

Magic, Ever-Evolving By David Schrom

In community I’ve learned about friendship, fun, and freedom, and about blunders, miscalculations, and setbacks. In times of difficulty, I’ve recalled often Abraham Lincoln’s, “You can’t fail until you quit.”

The Past Is the Future: Intentional community shows us the way back By Colin Doyle

I see the future as consisting of local, organically-evolving communities. This will consist of people turning toward each other, not away as is the norm today.

Cities Are Shifting; How Can We Still Build Community? By Kylie Tseng

Often, I catch myself discounting people or places as options for community. I worry that a place is too rural, too red, too young, too old, etc. Yet I’m starting to see that these attributes can often be a community’s points of strength.

The Journey of a Multifaith Community Experiment and What Happens When You Don’t Own the Land? By Joyce Bressler

Many of the guest groups felt welcomed by the “radical hospitality” offered by the staff and volunteers, including the multifaith residents. Unfortunately, the owner saw things differently.

Our Past, Our Future, and Making the Most of Human Capital By Rev. Jacqueline Zaleski Mackenzie, Ph.D.

When prospective community members over the age of 55 come knocking on community doors and asking for membership, please think twice before saying “No, you are too old” without first asking what they have to offer a community.

We Get Up Again By See

Here, there have been no days spent alone and shaking in my pain, but friendship, support, love until I could stand on my own again. No fairy tales for our children, just the strong, honest beauty of pain and love in loss.

Stumbling Toward Diversity in a Rural Intentional Community By Marc Baber

Any attempt to make people feel like they are actually, in spite of their efforts and sacrifices, bad people strikes at the heart of what keeps this community ticking.

Working Effectively with Especially Challenging Behaviors, Part Two By Diana Leafe Christian

Maybe you’ve tried various remedies in your community: heartfelt conversations, formal mediations, or giving second chances—but nothing seemed to make any difference. If so, please don’t blame yourselves.

Narcissistic Attitudes and Behaviors

Impaired Empathy

Touching the Dead, The Object of the Game, Lightning’s Compass, Praising the Rain, O Loveliest, Given, Human Error By Stephen Wing

All through the peak / of the downpour, / that three-note birdcall never stopped / praising the rain.

REACH

Notes in Passing: The Two Realms of Community By Paul Freundlich

Integrating the values of community into the functionality of community yields inspiring results.

You can order a copy of this issue here.